This Unquestionably Made My Life Better

This past week I’ve had songs from a beautiful concert my choir performed running through my head.

I’ve been puzzling over why the improv scene I did where Jake tried to order crocodile fries was so funny when it was so simple.

I’ve occasionally been walking around my kitchen doing the steps to lead (instead of follow) west coast swing.

And tonight I’ll hopefully(!) review some sailing concepts before getting out on the water this weekend.

For the past year or so I’ve been in a huge season of exploring hobbies. Most weeknights and weekends I’m out of the house doing something that I enjoy.

And hobbies have unquestionably made my life better.

So, I’d like to point your attention in the direction of hobbies as a component of creating a great life.

* With the caveat that I get that not every season of life is conducive to free time and pursuing hobbies. Being in full-on parenting mode, caretaking an ill relative, going to school in addition to working, being in a stressful season at work, or dealing with health issues can all put a damper on the energy we have available for fun. My current situation is single, childless, in an established business, and parents who are in ok health (for the moment), so I have a lot of room for hobbies.

And, even if now isn’t the right moment to act on a hobby impulse, I’d still like to plant a seed around hobbies because they can serve a few important purposes in our lives.

Hobbies Provide Alternate Spaces for Identity and Belonging

For many people, myself included, work and family are core components of our identity.

These huge orienting entities in our lives are important but not fixed.

Sometimes we lose jobs. Or we retire from them. Kids grow up. Relationships can end.

Those transitions can be particularly difficult when our core focuses have taken up so much of our time and attention that we don't have a life outside of those things.

By investing some energy into hobbies today you give yourself a place you can go to and be known in when other parts of your life are in flux.

For example, when a member of my choir tragically lost her son she had a built in avenue to receive support via the choir. The choir sang at her son's funeral. And she had a place to go, choir practice, when it felt appropriate in her grieving process.

Hobbies can give you a reassuring sense of community and continuity independent of the other major parts of your life. They can be places where you feel a sense of confidence, comfort, and familiarity.

Hobbies are also a way to express our preferences, which is a form of expressing our identity.

Sometimes in career coaching a client and I will note that there’s a particular area that they love that they don’t want to make the focus of their career. I always encourage them to try to find ways to incorporate that interest into their life as a hobby because it’s so obviously true for them and a part of who they are.


Hobbies Give You a Chance to Grow and Stay Active

There are ever increasing ways that technology can take care of many aspects of life for us.

And as humans, it’s a healthy thing to have challenges, problems to solve, and new things to learn over time.

It’s good for our brain, our body, and our overall well-being to have places where we can feel a sense of improvement and development.

Hobbies are an excellent avenue to keep growing and stay sharp.

I don’t really need to know how to sail to survive in daily life, but the activity of sailing challenges my directional thinking, my skill at certain maneuvers, and my ability to figure things out in the moment when they go wrong. All of that is highly engaging.

One of my sailing friends says that when she’s out on the water she’s not thinking about anything else. And I know just what she means.

Hobbies are a great opportunity to get out of our heads and into the moment with activities that are inherently compelling to us and that also ask something of us.

My sense is that often our free time can default towards a habit of consumption of television or social media. I get that there are moments in life when vegging out is just the thing.

​​​​​​​But I would also question this default setting and test out if it is actually what you like best or just what you’re in the habit of doing. Switching off of television and into hobbies has had a staggeringly positive effect on my well-being and enjoyment of life.


Hobbies Are (Ideally) Fun!

Last month I was helping my mom recover from a knee replacement surgery, which pulled me out of my normal routines and hobbies. I noticed how much smaller my life felt while I was away. I felt more deflated and disconnected.

​​​​​​​My mom’s making a great recovery, and I got back to regular life last week.

I really noticed the contrast of how much energy I got from having things on my calendar to look forward to most days once I returned home – namely my hobbies!

Of course, not every moment of hobby time is fun. Sometimes it’s scorching hot out on the water or a teacher is talking too much in a class or one person’s bad mood impacts a whole group. The first few weeks or months in a new activity aren’t as fun as when I’ve been participating for a while and have made friends.

But in general, when I participate in my hobbies, I see friendly faces and get to do something that I enjoy, which, for me, is usually some sort of physical, connecting, or expressive activity. I laugh. I chat. I learn new things. I have fun!

Adults who are engaging in things they like in their free time are generally in a good mood.

And even though it does take some energy to get to a hobby, and even more energy to initiate a hobby, once I’m into a thing I find I usually get energy and a bit of pep in my step from participating.

I will note that not all hobbies are fun for all people. One of my friends shared that she participated for two years in an improv troupe without quite registering or expressing that she didn’t like it and didn’t want to be there.

I used to participate in more extreme physical challenges, because that’s what folks at my gym were doing until I realized, “Oh, you guys actually like this stuff!” I didn’t. Pain tolerance and competition aren't really my things.

​​​​​​​To each their own!

It can take some exploration to find what’s a fit for you and your preferences, but it's worth the effort. There's a whole world of people and hobbies out there to discover.

To support my community in having more fun I’ll be hosting a free community workshop on hobbies later this month. We’ll explore what hobbies you might like, how to plug in to a new activity, and work through any concerns or objections you might have around getting started.

Check out the community events page for more details on the workshop!